Freedom of Voice

My good friend and fellow writer, Helen Sadler, posted this quote by Michael Xavier to a page she created for a few of us attending the Sanibel Island Writer's Conference this week: So You want to be tough You want to be rebellious You want to be a badass Then show your heart to everyone... EVERYONE. Whenever she throws down the gauntlet, I am willing to accept the challenge. In fact, this one just helped push me into something I was already thinking of doing: Sharing my blog in its entirety with everyone on social media, not just posting pieces here and there but mostly keeping it within my safe writing circle.  My writing is where I truly wear my heart on my sleeve, leaving me feeling pretty vulnerable at times. The empty page is my playground at times, my therapist at others. It oozes with authenticity, bleeds my true feelings.  I've decided to be tough, rebellious, and, well badass, I first have to be brave enough to show the contents of my heart...

As I sat Bonita Beach this morning, notebook and coffee in hand, the dolphins that came to say "hello" to my friend and I the month before were absent. In their place were birds--pelicans, seagulls, sanderlings, and snowy egrets--on the shore and bobbing in shallow waters, grabbing their morning meal. I started writing in my journal as the waves crashed on the shore, the cool breeze licking my arms, the sun warming my shoulders. My writing complete, I dug my toes into the shell-strewn sand and started to observe my surroundings more closely. More birds--and more people--had congregated. A few joggers went by. A couple of elderly ladies caught my attention with their sweatsuits, visors, tennis shoes. Their stroll was slow and purposeful, their glances fixed on the ground ahead of them, a plastic Publix bag sagging with seashells. As they ambled by, they debated if what they plucked from the sand was worthy of being tossed in the grocery bag, destined for some jar on the back...

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end." That line from "Closing Time" by Semisonic plays on a loop in my head every time I hear the song. It makes me contemplate what an end really looks like, if it even exists. We have tons of phrases that relate to the word  end. Some that come to mind: All's well that ends well. The end of my rope At the end of the day Loose ends At my wits' end The end of the road Burn the candle at both ends End of the line Going off the deep end Holding the wrong end of the stick Fairy tale ending The light at the end of the tunnel Begin with the end in mind What I hate about the idea of an end is the abruptness with which one thing stops and another starts, the lack of connection between the events in our lives that it implies. I don't think life works that way at all. Instead, I believe that every situation--whether we perceive it as negative or positive--builds toward another. Every thin...

Incidents like the mass shooting in Vegas have many engaging in some long overdue soul-searching, including me.  This morning as I journaled, I dug deeper, started mining what's in my heart. Fueled by coffee and the need for some answers, I relentlessly dredged into the depths, leaving no stone unturned. It led me to this burning question: What is love? It's a word we like to throw around, make cute phrases out of, but do we know what it really  entails? I began my list: It means to lay aside blame, shave away prejudices, forgive flaws, lend a hand, even when it means sacrificing my own needs and wants, see everyone--and I mean every one-- through a lens of compassion. Then, it hit me: there's a profound definition of love in the Bible. A quick Google search helped me find 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7: Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it ...