Don't Hold Your Breath

Breathe.

It's something we do all day everyday without thinking about it, an autonomic reflex. However, unlike some other reflexes, our breath is something we can actually control--to some degree. 

Think about the little kid who holds his or her breath in the midst of a temper tantrum. Not that I've witnessed this, but apparently, if said kid passes out, breathing will resume. Let that be a lesson to small children everywhere who might think this tactic will freak their parents out and get them what they want. It won't work. 

Disclaimer: I'm going to publicly admit something that may paint me as a monster mom, so if you don't want your opinion of me tainted, stop reading here.

My son actually pulled this stunt once. He wasn't even a year old, and I was at my parents house with him. I can't even remember what triggered the tantrum, but the little sucker threw himself back in a fit of rage and held his breath.

My mother begged me to pick him up. I remember saying something like, "I'm not going to let a 9 (or maybe 10) month old hold me hostage."

"But, he's going to pass out." 

"If he does, he'll start breathing again."

For the record, he didn't pass out. He also stopped the tantrum. And, he never had another one. Well, at least not a throwing down, holding his breath type. 

On the opposite end of the spectrum, many of us employ conscious, controlled deep breathing as a coping mechanism and/or relaxation technique, taking that automatic function and harnessing its power for our good. This is a much better tactic than holding our breath, waiting for things to change. The world doesn't care about our temper tantrums, the things that rile us up, make us so angry and frustrated we want to throw ourselves on the ground kicking and screaming. 

The best thing we can do is breathe through it and let that breath guide us to make rational decisions, help us take the next best step toward healing. 

Breathe.