Freedom of Voice

Oddly enough, I realized I wrote a piece with the same title a couple of years ago.  Those of you who know me know I am not a fan of platitudes. Those of you who really know me know I loathe them.  Disclaimer: If you think you might be offended by some straight talk, please exit the building now. I am not trying to lose friends or make enemies, but I realize some of what I will say will be unsettling to people who insist on keeping up the "positive at all costs" facade.  For those of you still here, thanks for being willing to delve into this radical idea with me.  Here goes. In general, I do lean toward optimistic, but not the over-the-top Sally Sunshine version. My brand of optimism is positivity with a healthy dose of realism and an even healthier dose of sarcasm to ease the pain. To pretend that everything is perfect and wonderful and great all the time is a sign of delusion in my book. Not that I piss on anyone's pot of gold. If that is the way you want to live,...

Thank you to my writing compadre for this idea. It was a fun way to kick off 2021! 1)  Highlight of 2020-- Well, this was actually taken in November 2019, but the anniversary of this very special union was in 2020, so I am counting it. 1) Because it is that special. When one of your kids finds love eerily similar to the one you have with your own husband, there is a special kind of peace, and 2) because I have no other highlights of 2020 on my camera roll. None of my son's non-existent graduation ceremony from UF, no vacations, nada.  2) Meaningful Moment Doesn't look like much, but this gray whale sighting--particularly a scarred female--was a pivotal moment in my life. I wrote a poem about that day that was published, and the mystical events that surround it still resonate with me to this very day.  3) Moment with Loved Ones We have had so many great family vacations, but I just love the expressions on each of our faces on this Utah ski trip. Being silly and laughing. P...

 first line comes from Rupi Kaur's Home Body  (pg.37) Out of the Dark I am loving myself out of the dark slowly but hopefully surely  finding a way to live with my flaws embracing their special place in who I am and the paths I need to trod  to find the light.

Watching your face light up as I hand you a gift. A s you carefully peel back the careful wrapping,          I can feel your  anticipation, my own excitement rising. Your smile spreads, swallowing everything around it. As you examine the carefully chosen item,          I can feel your gratitude, a warm glow spreads throughout me. The gift of giving is the best gift of all. 

As the storm blows through,      the birds still sing,      their chirps pinging from tree to tree      where they found shelter. Amidst the roaring thunder,      their voices can be heard loud and clear,      almost defiant, but not quite. As the gray clouds move swiftly,      casting ominous shadows below,      their calls grow louder, more frequent. Temporarily grounded,      waiting to take flight.

~1 my voice awakens   after months of blank pages  healing words will flow ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ after months of blank pages my voice awakens opening the flow of words ~2 Where were you hiding? All this time lying in wait for the right moment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ All this time, lying in wait Where were you hiding? Or what were you hiding from? ~3 Slight wind, soothing breeze waking up the weary trees, setting my soul free. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  Waking up the weary trees energizing breeze  setting my weary soul free. ~4 A new way to be, blessing those who come your way, committing to change ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Finding a new way to be, committing to change, blessing those who come your way. ~5 the power of words much underestimated never disappoints  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ much underestimated  the power of words yet it never disappoints 

The other day on Facebook, I asked my friends to drop a positive word I could carry into 2019. I got the idea from my husband’s cousin’s post and figured my friends would not disappoint. They didn’t. Here’s the thing: These words only carry weight if I actually do something with them. And I truly plan to incorporate each and every one into my life on 2019 (except maybe the suggestion of kinky...lol). So much better than some lame resolutions I won’t keep. These are more than words. They are sincere well-wishes, prayers, blessings. And just to irritate one of my poetry-hating friends who shall remain nameless, I’m putting them into a NYE poem. Words carry weight only when you      collect them like stones,             each one carefully chosen                   for its uniqueness, its beauty. Adaptability leads to serenity. Caring increases kindness. Daring to unleash some hellfire, ...